Family/Relationships Sylvie & Jay Family/Relationships Sylvie & Jay

Taking Care of Aging Parents

As our parents age, they may need our financial support. Many immigrants and women have taken on the role of caregivers for their aging parents. This can be a daunting task, especially if we are also trying to raise our own families and save for our own retirement. However, there are ways immigrants and women can help their parents without putting their own financial health at risk.

Here are a few tips:

  1. Start by talking to your parents about their finances. This can be a difficult conversation, but it is important to understand their financial situation and what they need from you. Find out what their income and expenses are, and what their retirement plans are.

  2. Help them assess their assets and liabilities. This will give you a better idea of their financial strengths and weaknesses. If they have any assets that they can sell, or if they have any debts that they can consolidate, this could free up some money to help them with their expenses.

  3. Look into government programs and benefits. There are many government programs that can help seniors with their financial needs. These programs can provide financial assistance, healthcare coverage, and other services. Senior Lifestyle has a list of organizations that you can reach out to for assistance.

  4. Consider setting up a trust or other financial vehicle. This can help protect your parents' assets and ensure that they are used for their intended purpose.

  5. Get legal documents in place. This includes a power of attorney, a living will, and a health care directive.

  6. Be prepared to provide direct financial assistance. If your parents need help paying their bills or other expenses, you may need to provide them with direct financial assistance. However, it is important to do this in a way that does not jeopardize your own financial health.

  7. Help your parents downsize their home. If your parents have a large home, they may be able to save money by downsizing to a smaller home. This can also help them to stay more independent.

  8. Talk to your parents about long-term care options. As your parents age, they may need long-term care, such as a nursing home or assisted living facility. This can be a costly option, so it's important to plan ahead.

  9. Be prepared to make sacrifices. If you do decide to financially support your aging parents, you may need to make some sacrifices in your own life. This could mean cutting back on your own expenses or delaying your retirement plans. If you plan on living with your parent, this could mean giving up your space and privacy and your family sharing their space as well.

Throughout this process, you should also use these tips to take care of YOU.

  • Get organized. This will help you to track your parents' income and expenses, and to make sure that they are getting the help they need.

  • Be patient and understanding. Aging can be a difficult time, and your parents may need your emotional support as well as your financial support.

  • Don't be afraid to ask for help. If you are struggling to support your parents, don't be afraid to ask for help from your siblings, other family members, or friends.

  • Set boundaries. It is important to set boundaries between your own responsibilities and your parents' needs. This means saying no when you need to, and taking time for yourself to relax and recharge.

  • Delegate tasks. Don't try to do everything yourself. Ask for help from other family members, friends, or a professional caregiver.

  • Take care of your health. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating healthy foods, and exercising regularly. This will help you stay strong and healthy so you can care for your parents.

  • Take care of your mental health. Take care of your mental health. Caring for aging parents can be stressful. Find ways to manage stress, such as meditation, yoga, or spending time with loved ones. Do things you enjoy.

It is also important to remember that you are not alone in this. There are many resources available to help you support your aging parents. Talk to a financial advisor, a social worker, or a elder law attorney to get more information and advice.

Providing financial support to aging parents can be a challenge, but it is also a rewarding experience. By following these tips, you can help your parents to live a comfortable and secure retirement without putting your own financial health at risk.

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Family/Relationships Sylvie & Jay Family/Relationships Sylvie & Jay

How to talk to your spouse about money

Talking to your spouse about money can be very challenging. This is in part because each spouse has a different relationship with money. The value they give to money, how they feel about money, the way they manage money, or their financial upbringing.

Talking to your spouse about money can be very challenging. This is in part because each spouse has a different relationship with money. The value they give to money, how they feel about money, the way they manage money, or their financial upbringing. 

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Due to these differences, It is no surprise that talking to your spouse about money can awaken feelings of anxiety, fear, resentment, and distrust.

 These money talks even though stressful, are necessary for a healthy marriage.

 π“𝐑𝐞 π π«πžπšπ­ π§πžπ°π¬ π’𝐬....... Some things can be done to make these conversations less stressful.

In our quest to build a stronger, and more solid financial foundation for our marriage, we realized that 5 things are needed for a couple to talk about money without fighting. 


 1- Be open and honest with each other.  Avoid playing the blame game. It is hard for ANYONE to admit that they are wrong. 

β€œHERE ARE MY STRENGTHS, HERE ARE MY WEAKNESSES. SINCE WE ARE A TEAM, HOW CAN WE SUPPORT EACH OTHER?”

2- Be aware of your emotions, and keep them in check. Taking emotions out of these discussions is a hard task. So talk to your spouse about the feelings you have about your current financial situation and how your feel thinking about the future. Lead the conversation with love, and focus on creating a financial plan to tackle any money problems. 

3- Schedule financial discussions and make them fun (why not make it a date night too? ) Try not to talk to your spouse about money when you have had a long tiring day at work, or when emotions are running high. Give your partner an added reason to show up. Make room in your budget for fun activities to keep each other motivated to keep working toward your goals.

 4- Be consistent. Be intentional and make these discussions recurring events on your schedule. Block out specific dates in the month and set reminders. Those small consistent changes add up to the big wins.

 5- Both parties should be involved. No spouse should dominate the conversation. Be sure to seek each other’s opinions. Ask open-ended questions that allow your partner to contribute more than a β€œYes/No” to the discussion. If you have a difficult time controlling the conversation, get a timer and take turns talking uninterrupted. 

Talking to your spouse about money keeps you accountable to each other. It also facilitates you reaching the financial goals your set for your marriage sooner. 


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